Talitha Koum

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” -Elizabeth Kubler Ross

The past few days, weeks, months I have found looking in the mirror and not seen the same old, happy girl who I once saw. Instead of seeing a smile, I see a face which is haggard by fear, doubt, guilt. These past few days, weeks, months I have been so unhappy and bound by the hatred, and pain that I have been oblivious to all the beauty surrounding me. These past few days, weeks, months I have given darkness the power to strip my joy from me. These past few days, weeks, months I have allowed an addiction to nearly consume my every thought and motive. These past few days, weeks, months I have become a person which I would have never seen myself becoming as a child.

Yet though this pain, today, I wake up and I realized that today is the day.

Today is the day to stand up. Today is the day to wipe away the tears. Today is the day to know I have been forgiven. Today is the day to know that my GOD is so much bigger than these thoughts which are bombarding me, these sins which I keep lusting after, and the pains which break the inner-most layers of my heart. Today is the day to get on my feet, and run in the direction of my dreams; my dreams of changing the world, my dreams of being the woman I have always dreamed about.

From this moment forward: there is no more looking at the mirror and seeing pain, suffering, remorse; all I want to see from now on is beauty, love and a dreaming soul. I am going to use this blog as motivation to find those dreams, who I truly am, and the joy that I know is there and that I deserve to receive.